How To Shake Hands - And Leave 'em Standing

Did you know that shaking 

hands was originally 

intended to show that 

both people were unarmed?

Shaking hands also 

transfers more germs than 

kissing?  

Me either, but it's

sure giving me ideas. 

In many countries, shaking 

hands is not valued or 

thought appropriate as it 

is in America.  

It's a good idea to check 

the customs when visiting 

another country.

In America: 

Today, we shake hands to say 

hello; show trust; show 

confidence; to engage and 

interact with both new and 

good friends; and to meet 

and greet business associates.  

It follows that there would 

be a right and a wrong way to 

shake the hand of your friend 

or acquaintenance. Developing 

a firm grip, can land that job!  First impressions matter!

When interviewing, one of the few components that can set

you apart from the pack, is a good solid handshake.  

All of us can recall those limp, weak handshakes that resemble

the "wet noodle."  What message did you take away from that

greeting?  

First impressions are hard and almost impossible

to undo; strong or weak, or indifferent.  They are also very 

important when establishing links and connections with 

others, which we all do everyday.  

This physcial act sends a powerful subliminal message, 

therefore let's give it a few moments of our attention. 

As a foster mom, teaching our young children to give proper 

handshakes was part of our skill-building.  We always observed

a higher level of confidence when they learned this skill.  

Introductions became impressive to those who visited the home. 

As they went to church and other community activities with us, they 

made friends and gained respect from those who met them.  

When they interviewed for jobs, they moved ahead of many 

other applicants.  Resist the temptation to under estimate 

the impact of proper handshakes. 

Here Are 7 Easy Handshaking Tips:

1. Extend your right hand to meet the other person's right hand. (Etiquette says that if a woman is meeting a man, she extends her hand first, so the man knows she is willing to make the physical contact. This inclination from a woman is normally based on her "vibes" or, insight, or feelings at the moment and must be respected. If she does not extend her hand, a nod and comment "Nice to meet you." is enough.)
2. Look the person in the eye for 2 - 5 seconds. Longer eye contact can be interpreted as too forward, less as too timid.
3. Point your thumb upward toward the other person's arm and extend your arm at a slight downward angle. If your arm is higher than your waist, the leverage is thrown off and the handshake is clumsy, even risking touching body parts best left alone.
4. Wrap your hand around the other person's hand when your thumb joints come together. Slow movements are best so the hands come together naturally in a grasp.
5. Grasp the hand firmly and squeeze gently once. Remember that limp handshakes are a big turnoff, as are bone-crushing grasps. Be aware of bone aches, joint problems from others; you don't want to send them to the ER.
6. Hold the handshake for 2 to 3 seconds. The Handshake and Eye Contact should end at about the same time, then regain the Eye Contact as appropriate for the ensuing conversation.
7. The handshake may have movement up and down briefly, or it could just consist of a quick grasp.

Avoid:

• Over-Pumping your hand up and down. This can be interpreted as controlling and appears to be too "in your face." Enthusiasm is good but only in small doses.
• Too strong of a grip. It's painful and controlling and everything else wrong you can think of. IT HURTS. Not a good first impression.
• Too weak of a grip. This says nothing of value. At the same time it shouts shyness and timidity. To not shake hands is better.
• Pulling the person towards you - or pushing the person backwards. Both are too invasive and controlling.
• Uncomfortable or prolonged silence
• Talking too much
• Too much eye contact 3- 5 seconds is good; look away, then back as is comfortable.
• Not enough eye contact; not looking at the person says either you are too shy; you are too busy; or they are unimportant.

Practice with your spouse, friend, or co-worker. It's worth it. A firm, comfortable handshake speaks volumes when making a lasting first impression!!

Job Interview Tip:

Never say: I hated my last boss/job. Automatic bells go off inside the interviewer's head. "He/she's a trouble-maker" they'll think.

Say instead: "I'm looking for a job that will be challenging and rewarding; I want to do my part to help make the business a success."